Thursday, May 24, 2012

concerning culture shock at the grey submarine

I was voicing some of my concerns to A.G. about someone who had visited the Grey Submarine for the first time this past week.  Culture shock?  I would think so.
 'So, observations?' she said.
'Uh..I don't know. I guess I just wondered if he was a little...uncomfortable?  It seemed like he laughed a lot, like in the frisbee game...he would laugh for no apparent reason.  It could be something as little as "hey pam! right here if you need me..." and he'd laugh.'
Anne looked disappointed. Not necessarily in the content of my reply, but rather the truth it gave away: that I had not analyzed this thoroughly enough to come to a layman's conclusion on the subject.
'Rey!' she said, chagrinned at my lack of insight, 'See this from his point of view.  He was playing with midgets who all ran around in circles and yelled and would get feisty and worked up and who would knock each other down and blaze right through anyone who had the frisbee....I'm sure it was hard for him not to laugh the whole time! If you think about it, there's nothing not funny about it.'

       And so of course, after thinking it over, I think I must confess this to be true.

Monday, May 21, 2012

concerning the solar eclipse, or lack thereof.

  We camped out on a back road last night to watch the eclipse.  The sun sank before we could see it, so no eclipse for us.  Five more years...maybe we'll nail it then.  But we did a beautiful sunset.  And then we drove the long way home with our hands out the windows, singing 'swing low' with soul, and as many scripture songs as we could think of.   

        i can't imagine what our world would be like without cosmic radiation.
goodnight, genteel people.

Sunday, May 20, 2012


Heart of Life 
is Good

I don't really have something specific to write tonight.  I'm just happy, mostly.  I think you would be too if you were here right now...there's not really any way not to be happy. Or at least content.
 Michael is here.  So my windows are open and he's playing to all of us girls in the room.  Dawn is wearing a straw hat, asking me if the weight on my renewed driver's license is the same as the first one.  'Is it better or worse, gabe?'
  Anne to Melody,
 'New Hampshire?'
But they insist on pronouncing 'Des Moines'  (derh-m'ohns) because it was settled 'by the Frinch.' ...At least the river was named after something French.  Merry is lying on the bed propping her feet on Dawn's back and reading some secret book.  Mama sticks her head in the door and says 'whoosh! y'all need the air on back here...Michael, I'll play your cd in my kitchen if you'll make one for me,'  and Anne keeps smiling at something.  Crickets and guitar playing.  It's just right.  And so is the world tonight at the Grey Submarine.  Disappointment is a part of life.  I guess pain is too.  But beauty is also a part that is only intensified through both of those once we can see it again.  Some how - in some good way - all that is bitter and hard and saddening will be beautiful one day.   Days like this remind me of that.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012


Patrick has dark brown hair and dark brown eyes and is 24. I saw him in the first aisle, with all the licorice and bagels and for some reason really wanted to talk to him.  So I did.  His Mom was wheeling him in his chair and said, 'He can't talk, but he loves people to talk to him.' I asked him questions, which is silly I guess when they might be frustrated that they can't answer back but I talked to him about Mother's day and books and summer.  She said he has a type of syndrome which hinders his movement or capability to care for himself or even express himself with coordinated movements.  She had told me that when I reached to shake his hand.  Of course, as I discovered, his hands wouldn't to do that so I held it instead and the way he turned his face and head, even though his eyes didn't focus...I don't know.  It was if he was stimulated just to have someone touch him and talk to him, as if he was eager for it.  It made me sad.  Who knows what his mind is like?  He probably thinks and comprehends more than people generally give him credit.  It made me thankful for what a rich life God has blessed me with and thankful too, that I met Patrick.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Parable of the Faucet

He calls me Incorporation and this was Abe's advice to me tonight. 

'It's like this, Incorporation.  Hear the Parable of the Faucet.  You can either drink the city water where you have crazy rednecks in the high tower, skinny dippin' at night - which water then comes through that big faucet over there; or you can get a major filter system which filters the water even a thousand times and comes out that other little faucet right there.  In the end it comes down to a question of quality: What do you want to settle for? Or do you?'

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

thanks, people.

It has come to my attention that some of the people who have read this blog are based overseas.  Now, I have to say that whether or not you ever stop here again is not the point, but rather that I was happy - thrilled - that you did at all.  Perhaps it's not unusual for this to happen in other people's spheres, but know, dear folks whether U.S or other, I thank you for 

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Sunday, May 6, 2012

the worst mosquito bite in my life.

  Twelve years old and sitting on a church pew in Ripley,  Mississippi I was not expecting a jab into my face by some pesky insect, but there it was.  Summer days in Georgia are hot and humid, but summer days in Mississippi are relentless.  I was absentmindedly sitting there, swinging my feet and rubbing my face at the place of attack when a fellow walked up in the pew behind me.  We will say his name was Steffic Erwin.  Now, Steffic was no ordinary fellow.  He was tall and strong with big, rippling hands, clear, keen eyes and an easy gentleness about him.  From the first time I'd seen Steffic, I was smitten. This was the worst time of all. Twelve years old in Ripley Mississippi with so much of life changing already and on top of that a large, red sore on my cheek and Steffic Erwin right behind me, it was almost too much to bear. So I stared at my feet and at the pew in front of me and at the carpet.  Steffic was a gentlemanly chap, though, so he naturally began some sort of chit-chat.  To keep from showing the terrified horror I was capable of feeling at Twelve Years Old, I turned around in my pew to attempt my powers at pulling conversation out of a dark, dry box in the air that I was pretty sure didn't have one word in it.  I turned and inevitably, I blushed.  I've never had control over my blushing, and it comes on with a passion at the least desirable times.  This bite served one useful purpose, I guess; I didn't have to try to think of anything to say because Steffic immediately pointed out that there was a red place on my cheek and had I been bitten?  The girl next to him {we shall call her Adoline}, also agreed very coolly that I had in fact - it appeared - been bitten. Yes, I would be alright, no I didn't need cream.  So I turned back around and I'm sure I blushed for another 10 minutes.  The  { what shall I call them?  Light bulbs under my skin?? }  deserve some credit.  They've been successfully illuminating my face for over twenty years now, and still have as much vigor and spontaneous ability to glow red at any moment as they ever did.

   I was recalling this story to Anne this morning, and I was bemused at thinking of myself at that age.  Supposedly it's a preferable thing to never go through an awkward stage. Preferable or no, however, I definitely had my fair share and I can't say I'm sorry for it either.  Those awkward moments and days and years have given me much mirth in retrospect and I'm sure that all the ones I still have coming to me will have the same amount of amusement if not more, by the time I'm eighty.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

chasing the light

there are some things in life that are beautiful and intriguing and curious and strong.  i sometimes wish i were not so quick to endear these things and people.  they pass from the scope of tangible too soon and often leave me feeling more empty than when i met them. it's like going to the moon, i guess and coming back from that dynamic experience with maybe a rock.  some of these things leave a good memory. or at least a good imprint of a firm handshake.
  this is a good reminder for me to chase after Light - the thing that will keep on being there and leading no matter what.

now when you find it
you keep it
in a permanent state.