Read this today while researching some photographers and was glad someone else had put into words what I've thought before:

"...You know how sometimes music makes you feel like you’re in a different place? Or it can grab you, accentuating some moment just so, making it a little more wonderful? How about when you see a photo, and feel instantly nostalgic for a place or person you’ve never been to or met, but still somehow, through that captured light, feel a connection? Music and photography are forever entwined, both as creative outlets and powerful emotional forces…"

life of a thought

almost i am persuaded that a thought has no form, no breath, no life, 

until it lives on paper. 

of my little dawn

Isaiah 40 has been a beautiful passage to me this week, presenting itself more boldly than ever I remembered it before.  I've read it over and over…again, it's that force of God that is forever protecting His little ones from those who would destroy them, and showing Himself a bold, fierce and gentle Father.  Some of my favorites…

40/10 − 11 

'Behold, the Lord God will come with strong hand, and his arm shall rule for Him: behold, his reward is with Him, and His work before Him.  He shall feed his flock like a shepherd: he shall gather the lambs with his arm, and carry them in his bosom and shall gently lead those that are with young.'

This passage was applied to my mind today in a sweet way.  I was looking through old photos/documents {i wish i could say "in my attic, among some old leather cases and thick, dusty trunks…" but alas! it was all this villain-ish, virtual age} and found this picture of Dawn.  

It's a fine photo. Pretty clear. Kind of childishly sweet. But the thing that got me was remembering taking it, and realizing that the reason it was waist up was because at that time she was sitting in a wheel chair.  That seems so distant, most times, yet, during that dark season no one had the comfort of knowing she'd ever be healed.  The question of her ever walking, playing, sitting cross-legged to play a game or getting in bed by herself was besides the point.  We were simply trying to face the fact that she couldn't walk, that the pain she dealt with on a daily basis was unimaginable and the cause was as vague and unknown as the cure.  How gently God has gathered His children to Himself, though…He is merciful, gracious, kind.  He would have been the same, had He seen fit not to heal Moriah, but, oh His kindness in doing so!  We found out a month or so that the virus she'd been attacked with, also affected thousands of other people. 1/3 of those people recovered fully, 1/3 have relapses and chronic back trouble and 1/3 of the people affected never recover.

  Surely, He is gracious in mercy.  How can I deny that, when I see Dawn, healthy, strong {as an ox, I might add - she has the fortitude of a native}, full of vigor, life, bright imagination, a will so strong as to impress and even at times embarrass her piers and elders to shame?  

Thankful to this great God, this Mighty One who has 'renewed strength like the eagles' so that my sweet Dawn can 'run and not be weary...' and 'walk and not faint.'

a good day's end

         "Rose!" Dawn shouts to Merry, whom she calls 'Rosamond', "I'm going to take a shower, and by the time I get out, you had better have made those chocolate chip cookies!"  But then she runs to Merria and puts an arm around her neck and says winkingly "I'z jest kiddn, kid.  We love you…now make us some good little cookies, Rosamond…"

It's old carpet and blue and very walked and sat and wrestled and laid on.  I sat on it, back to a doorframe and watched her play.  She's tough and short and spunky, and I love her. I love watching her play.  It's a doorway to her very soul, I think. D Formsma bakes cookies too, and the most steamy, crusty-on-the - outside- soft- on-the inside - kind of bread you ever tasted. And cinnamon rolls. But this day she was out of the kitchen and at the piano, just for me, and I felt as special as I should have at this token of kindness. She introduced to me Franz Liszt and his  "Three Concert Etudes S.144 No.3 "Un Sospiro".  I've never forgotten him since.

  It's not just the piece. It's the way she plays it that made all the hot wet things come splashing on my cheek and hands.  I love it now, for many reasons, and have listened to it over and over again today.

  Good old home. I'm glad to be back after a summer of traveling.  I love traveling, but you know, it's good to walk in and be home and to see and hear all the things of home that make it what it is…The smell, the creaky benches, the way the front door slams, the way the back door stays open because no one remembers to shut it; the faucet that, even though it's new, has now followed in the footsteps of its Elder Faucet and keeps sliding down and turning off, most inconveniently; the lantana that has bushed over the very mailbox and stretches itself in all directions, oblivious to its eccentricity and merely absorbing all the beautiful sunshine it can manage; the way the purple bathroom trashcan is forever being turned catty-cornered then straight again, and how the rug never stays in one place, because some like it by the toilet, others by the tub, others by the sink; the sunflower in the back yard that we watched and waited for, and is now here, tall and gangly; the way the school room fan bangs when it's on high and how the books keep trying to fall out of the bottom of the piano bench, because it's so full; the back closets - the closets at all - and how they have too much, and ever room for more; the oven with a broken handle, the teapot that gets turned on without any water; the perpetual pot of coffee; the crickets outside the windows at night and the way the summer light comes through the kitchen window in the evening…home is a wonderful place, nor would it be without its little imperfections. 

 Tonight at prayer it struck me again what an unworthy recipient of all my Father's goodness I am. 

Does He not daily, even moment by moment open the windows of heaven to pour out His kindnesses on my life and family?  Daddy took my hand and squeezed it in his big calloused one as I sat on the side of his chair {I declare, one day that chair is going to have a panic attack and fall apart}.  Everybody went around and prayed.  That quiet evening restfulness.  Our family with that Great and Kind Friend who is always with us.  I like the way daddy's stomach rises and falls under my hand when he's holding it and the way he keeps holding it, even when mine gets hot like it does, and I like how the whippoorwill who lives in the front yard's evergreen tree seems to know the right time to sing his sweet, melancholy summer song. 

Merria just came and gave me a thumb full of chocolate chip cookie dough.

"Without chocolate chips, just for you," she says. 

All in all, I'd say that's a Good Day's End.

tuesday thoughts.

How quickly humanity turns on itself when confronted with distress, difficulty, disappointment, to search for what it can find only in the Great God who made us. 

 i would that i might trust more

in His goodness,

rest in His 

providence,

thirst for His presence,

abide in His will, 

that peace and sunshine of His face.

"And it shall be said in that day, Lo, this is our God; we have waited for Him, and He will save us: this is the Lord; we have waited for Him, we will be glad and rejoice in His salvation." 

                                                  - Isaiah 25.9

Tuesday Musings

He says to pick up where I am. So I do, because he says.

                                                                                                     Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Daddy sounds positively like a pirate when he sings in the shower.  

Getting ready for school this morning, Anna Gette scurried into my room and said,

"Rey-Moose, your room always smells like what I imagine an Israelite room to smell like."

"Oh really?" 

"Yeah," as she spread on lotion.  "With all the oils and such.  Tootles, Rey."  And away she scampered to carry all her portable property to the car.  Anna Gette carries more portable property to school with her than anyone I know.  Today we made 4 trips to the car loading it down, nook and cranny.  As always, she had two coffee cups and two straws and celery by her side. 

Chris' text to me yesterday: 'Just wanna say i think you're a swell sister and friend.  Let's get a boat and raincoats and wait for the water to rise enough that we can float away into the Hundred Acre Wood."

  Sweet Brother. 

It's dark and wet and dreary again this morning, but the coffee is perking and the early grey light even has some promise of goodness.  I can hear Mama and Daddy laughing in the living room.  Daddy's laugh in the morning is more like a great rolling thunder, low and rumbling.  He is fitly called Papa Bear.

 Last night Dawn stood at the foot of my bed in her usual place, rubbing my feet, the dear soul.  It had been a while since I'd been here to take part in this evening ritual of foot rubs and deep thoughts by Dawn. 

"Of all my fears when I was a little kid," she said, her long, golden brown hair tumbling over her shoulders and shadowing her bright, sober eyes, "Because, you know,  every kid has fears - of all my fears - my greatest fear was growing up.  I used to pitch tantrums in Mama's room and scream and kick my legs, I feared it so much.  I think I was more afraid of growing up than I was of the dark."

Oh, Childhood, you were a wonder and a terrible thing to leave. 

What is it that we fear so much in leaving it?  And what is it that we so long for when it's gone?

  For days like this Abe says to take it by the horns and make it what you want it to be.  'Roll with the punches or get rolled on', he reminds me of the old  adage, 'But in any case, shake off dull sloth, and gird up your loins, kid.'

Dawn is my 

daily inspiration. 

Don't ask why if 

you don't know.

For answers, please make your reservation for 

Thoughts With Dawn.

Call 770.787.4039 

and someone should answer the Land Line.

reflections of a sunday eve

'Honey, just remember to abide in the Vine no matter what comes…We abide in Him and Him in us - that's all we need.'

I can't tell you the number of times I've called Grandmama or laid looking at the ceiling next to her on Granddaddy's side of the bed or stood in the kitchen against the counter or on the stool and have heard just what I needed to hear.  We haven't necessarily even been talking about "my problems", just Life, and experiences, and Uncle Dave, Mama and Aunt Judy when they were little, Dr. So and So who was the best Doctor in town, or about the Great Depression and how Mamaw Voisy kept the floors swept and the house clean, even if they only stayed a day or two or a week…

  Grandmama is one of those unforgettable people…Sturdy, feisty, gentle, small.  You would hardly guess the Warrior beneath her cheerful smile and kind hands.  But she is.  She is one of the Greatest Prayer Warriors I know or have ever known, and she never ceases to make me wonder.  So much wisdom is stored in that life and such a wonderful nurturing spirit, you can't help but feel more alive after having talked with her or spent any time listening and being with her.

  So she tells me this week, 'abide in the vine…we have sufficient grace as we need it…don't fear what's not here yet.  You're still afraid of it because God hasn't given you the grace you need to go through it, and you may never have that grace because you may never need to go through it…But if He does lead you through it, He'll take your fear and give you grace instead.'

This seems to be a theme of late…Abide in the Vine and in the Word…Do this so that my 'joy might be full'…I hope I may.  I guess the full meaning of that comes with searching and trying to do it to the best of my knowledge, but I hope to that extent I might do so.

   It has been a wonderfully blustery, clear, cold, vibrant day, full of so many people I love. I cannot imagine loving any group of people more than my church family…They are so dear.

::Happy Sunday Afternoon::

 
 

Tonight is so blessedly clear and shiny.  Chris and I saw a shooting star on the way home. It fell long and bright over a large field and disappeared behind a line of dark pines.

Dawn shuffles in, red-eyed and wet-haired. 

'Goodnight, lil' Broge', she says. 

'Goodnight, Dawn.'

Goodnight,

 folks.

Tuesday is for Cowboys, Indians and Cornbread

 The Teachers of SCC, and the Lowly Minions.

"TIME FOR DEVO!!!" Dawn yelled on our end of the house.  I love our family devotions.  It's the best way I could think of to end a day.  Everybody has been going to school or work, soccer practice or have {like me}  been sitting in The Cave all day working on digital files to send (as Daddy would say) to the "World Wide Web".  Devotion ties all the loose ends together and we get to shove all the other things from the day out of our minds.  We get to laugh and tell each other bits about our day and whoever is the early bird gets to lay their head on Mama's lap, where she strokes and massages it.  Mama gives some of the best head massages. Dawn sits on the couch in soccer clothes, her face still painted from Cowboy and Indian Day at SCC and tells us about the girl on her team who makes strange noises with her mouth and about Bryson, who has curly blond hair and helps her on offense.  Anne stretches on the floor, her wet hair piled on her head, stuck through with a pen.  Merry's head is in Mama's lap, my head in Milly's.  Daddy's undertones make me sleepy at night. So low and rumbly.  I love it when he prays for us all by name.  Gives me almost a thrill in thinking that God is looking at my life in that moment of prayer, considering, loving and praying for me too.

  We were talking about Merry's Fellow tonight.  She had crawled onto Daddy's chair with him as is our fashion to do when he's sitting in it.  Milly worried,
"He still hasn't made Mayla mad enough to really see her bad side…"
"Yeah," confirmed Dawn, "He hasn't seen anything yet."
"I mean," Milly said, "He's made her a little mad, but not enough."
Daddy said, "He's seen the good side but make her mad and - " and with this he made his cat noise, clawing the air and grabbing Merry's leg."
"Boy, I can't wait 'til my guy sees my bad side," I said. "That's going to be fun, fun, fun."
"Aw," said Dawn, " You don't have to worry about it with Gabe so much.  You just leave her alone for a while and wait until she gets in a happy mood, then tell her she's been in a bad mood.  Or just scare her when she's in a bad mood and that'll fix it."
 {Dawn says this out of times of merciless experience when I have been victim to her scare schemes and have been "scared" as she says, "Into a Good Mood", but the reality is that I laugh so badly I can't help it, even if I'm not happy about it.}
"What about me?" Asked Merry to Dawn.  "What'you do about me when I'm in a bad mood?"
"I just stay out of your way." said Dawn.
Daddy chuckled, Dawn dribbled her ball in the living room and Milly told me that elbows have the oddest smell.  They all have the same smell, and it's an oddly Elbowish smell.  She examined mine.  "Well, Mildrow Wilson?  What do you say?"  She said mine was no exception.

Today was SCC and as it was First Tuesday it meant Pot Luck and Dress Up. Let me tell you, coming home from work to Mama's mashed potatoes, pork loin, green beans, home grown cream corn peas and cornbread was a treat to the soul.




                      ^ Sunfire the Mighty Warrior of her indian tribe, and Sunfire's Sister's Baby,  ^

whom Sunfire was caring for since her sister died.

Cowboys and Indians.

  .Sunfire.

p.s. let not your heart be troubled: daddy's got bacon in the freezer.

.Local Scalpings. 

for more info please dial

770.787.4039.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Happy October First Everybody!!!
  I have to say, besides it not being nippy and chilly and blue, it was a perfect day to kick October off with.  Grey and downy and drippy all day long, I want to hug days like this. Kiss them and pinch their cheeks, they are so endearing.   The school kids had play practice today, then came to our house to hang out.

  Ah!!! But daft me!!! We had supper at church last evening, and after services I did what I always do: I walked out of the building over to the lunch room and ate supper. without picking up my purse/Bible/notebook. Unless I'm very good, I generally forget I've done that, and have to go back and retrieve my stuff after the doors have been locked. Well, it was raining, of course, but right as we were leaving, I realized I hadn't gotten my stuff. I wasn't worried so much about my purse as I was a certain book that was beside it: my journal.  I need my journal, folks.  It is an essential part of my sanity and thought process. To be without it, is to be wretched. Took the keys, ran in, {didn't turn on the lights} felt on our pew for my stuff - didn't feel it, ran back out, jumped in the car and asked if anyone else had gotten it. No. Daddy jumped out, ran in, {turned on the lights} and brought out my purse. But my journal/Bible/notebook were still in there. I felt a sinking and slapping sensation across the face of my better judgement. AH! This is what I dread. And always try to make NOT happen. As it is, I've been scrounging for scraps of paper to write on and wondering why I didn't just turn on the lights.  P.s. my new moleskine from Chris is red. That's adventurous, isn't it? It's a cherry red. It's a flamboyant red.

excerpt from an old one::

Sunday, July 15, 2012

'I have so many pressure points nowadays, it's strange.  I just laid down and my eyebrows pressed that book and it was an odd pressure point." Merry was - is - lying across my stomach and Milly was lying across my legs, one head burrowed in the blankets.  She raised her head and said,

"I've had some pressure points too…Not a lot; the main one is when I floss, that tooth hits a nerve in my collar bone."

 This trio never fails to make me smile.

as it was raining, a.g. and i had to be a little innovative with our workout set up tonight.

did we feel hick?

yes.

did we feel redneck?

yes.

did we still do it?

you bet. 

~~~~~~  

a.g. fixed my hair into an Anne Shirley do-up. But she says teasing is the key.  she teased it so much, it went crazy. { love that a.g. is laughing so hard here she's almost crying. love that she can make me laugh more than any other person alive.}

'i don't want starbursts or marble halls…i just want a camel and needle, and 

gilbert blythe'

{do we pass, do you think, as fitting A. of G.G. characters?}

Oh what hath Jesus

 Done for me

Before my raptured eyes?

Rivers of Life 

Divine I see

and 

Trees of Paradise.